I am an 'Apprentice' Fan

The Apprentice (US &UK) is a constant favorite and guilty pleasure when it comes to reality TV shows. The show itself is insanely entertaining, while subtly educational. Perhaps one of the more "real" shows out of all other reality shows out there in the vast emptiness that is cable television (cough The Hills cough)- The Apprentice features intelligent contestants in the business arena vying for the ultimate job in NYC (The UK version- London). The candidates must be smart, unique, independent, cooperative, and ruthless in this competitive process to be number one.

The Apprentice has inspired me in many ways, such as garnering my interest in business or causing me to obsessively abuse the show's tagline: "You're fired!" as means to annoy family and friends. The Apprentice is a great show- but there are major differences between the US and UK versions that shed light on some strengths and weaknesses in comparison to the other.

And with that said: I rather enjoy the UK version much better.

Why UK version of the The Apprentice "trumps" the US version:

1. Lord Sugar (The UK counterpart to Trump) is much more rational and coherent in making decisions than Trump (who often times fires people based on whim and the mood of the day).

2. The beautiful English/Irish/Scottish/Welsh/etc. accents- oh God even the losers of the show sound like winners

3. The UK captures a grittier and realistic tone to the show, while the US show is very Americanish. Meaning: flashy, quick cuts, dramatic edits, abrupt zoom-ins, and the (bom chika wowwowwwwuh) like...Hence, veeezah veee, thus- the UK version is in a pure aesthetic sense seemingly "real-er."

Some notable differences between the UK and US versions (if you must know):

1. Most of the time, Americans fight for the Project Manager (aka group leader) position; their UK counterparts mostly shy away from this stressful responsibility.

1a. The influencing factor being: if you are the PM of a winning task you will be exempt from fireage on the next task (US). Lord Sugar does not follow Trump's risk-reward schema: PMs are still vulnerable and responsible for the next week's task.

2. UK version highlights that the show is a JOB INTERVIEW PROCESS. US version highlights WHO WILL STAND ABOVE THE REST AND WIN THAT 100,000 SALARY. I suppose when it all comes down to it, the prize and the conclusion are all the "same."

I highly recommend both shows (both US and UK versions) for anyone (interested in business or not) because it's fun, genuinely educational, and sometimes hilariously entertaining (stress + cameras + Lord Sugar + stress = loads upon loads of crying men and women). For those who don't know anything about the show: TV.com is a wonderful source for all things Apprentice.

You can watch episodes on YouTube. Or perhaps Hulu; in the near future.

Spin-Off Showdown: Celebrity Apprentice vs. Junior Apprentice

That aside, what do I think about Celebrity Apprentice (US)? A sort of spin-off show dedicated to celebrities (replacing the common persons) and charities (replacing the top $100,000 job)? At first I was defiant about it and had a tiny but explosive tantrum to Trump's stupid "creative" twist to the original series.

However, after closely following Celebrity Apprentice these past few years, I realize- it is not so bad (despite being 2 hours long every episode- aka a real draaaaaag). Being that I expected something more akin to a horrific traffic pile up, Celebrity Apprentice is... alright. The main driving factor to Celebrity Apprentice's "fun" is that the contestants are celebrities, already well-accomplished human beings. AKA they do not seem as desperate nor do not suck up to Trump as hard as the average Joe/Jill. But that does not mean all is well. Tempers flare. Overblown egos clash. And eventually you see celebrities acting like all of us: human beings that are bossy, eccentric, clueless, prideful, etc.

It's fun to see the likes of Sharon Osbourne utilizing her star-status to garner paparazzi support as a free ticket in obtaining high quality photos for promos. It's fun to see huge tantrums thrown (Melissa Rivers) at cameras/producers/etc. However, Celebrity Apprentice has become much more of a spectacle, less educational for aspiring viewers. Celebrity contestants use their star power/popularity more so than their talents to rake in the cash (although charity fundraising bulldog Holly Peete is something else!). Even Trump and his advisors (his kids) seem entertained by their group of celebrities running around like headless chickens- unused to the nitty gritty harsh reality of the business world.

The Junior Apprentice (UK) is a spin off series (season 1 has just ended) featuring kids as contestants. When I first heard of this concept my immediate reaction was: "WTF? What do kids know of business?" I must admit, I'm highly ashamed and have become incredibly humbled by my watching experience of the Junior Apprentice. Teenagers all over Britain (some who seem at the verge of puberty), are selected by their business ambitions/accomplishments to compete for the ultimate prize fund that will support a future business endeavor.

After episode 1 (6 episodes in total), I was immediately blown away by how accomplished, well-rounded, coherent, and intelligent these kids were. Some of them, (younger than 17 years old!), already had noteworthy businesses prior to the show. I've learned so much from these kids who performed fantastically in every project assigned to them and although there is the usual drama (mature kids are still kids after all), Lord Sugar's intentions spreading interest in business to the younger generation have completely shined through with each fun-filled episode.

Junior Apprentice = Hilarious, fun, and intelligent

I highly recommend any Apprentice fan to watch the Junior Apprentice (available on Youtube as of now). It's just fascinating to see business prodigies face off while using their wiles and wits to remain ahead. Kids think differently than adults and this twist makes this Apprentice series so awesome to watch.

Lord Sugar, yes is much easier on the kids (than on the adult prospects), but that is because he acts as a teacher figure rather than a boss figure. I loved every minute of the Junior Apprentice.

Overall Diva Scores

The Apprentice (US): A-

The Apprentice (UK): A

Celebrity Apprentice (US): C+

The Junior Apprentice (UK): A+

Diva Talkin',

SJ

Cream Puffs

A friend of mine, a self-proclaimed food connoisseur, had been nagging me for days (what seems like years) that I must try "Beard Papa's Cream Puffs" no matter what. What are "Beard Papa Cream Puffs"? Well, that was exactly what I asked her.

"The most wonderful cream puffs in the world!" was her prompt response.

Unperturbed by her descriptions ("Their shells are so fluffy"- "The cream is unbearably mindblowing!"- "All fresh and light like a cloud- only better"), I remained skeptical. How good could these cream puffs possibly be?

The only cream puffs I ate were the generic and intensely soggy ones at local bakeries. Could "Beard Papa's cream puffs" be any different?

Well, today, I decided I had to give Beard Papa's a try...and to my surprise I realized...

Four years ago, it was Krispy Kreme's original glazed donuts-

But today, Beard Papa's Cream Puffs reigns as King of all Baked Delicacies.

Like the day I first sank my teeth into a freshly baked, mouth-melting Krispy Kreme donut, biting into a vanilla cream puff from Beard Papa's was a mind-numbing epiphany. So this, was how cream puffs are supposed to taste like! I could not believe I've been eating tasteless cream puffs all my life, when such a thing existed right here in NYC!

The Beard Papa's cream puff that I ate, was approximately the size of my fist (perhaps a little smaller). Its shell was flaky and light in texture. The cream had been directly inserted to its bread shell right after my order; therefore the bread, encasing the cream remained crisp (akin to a croissant but less buttery) and un-soggy.

The vanilla filling itself was a very light cream filled with flavor yet not overly sweet. There had been a generous amount of cream in the cream puff, so for those who wish to try Beard Papa's- beware of inevitable cream spillage! Eating Beard Papa's cream puffs might have had been a messy experience but there were no complaints here- immediately after my first cream puff, I stood up to buy another.

I'm unsure if my description of Beard Papa's cream puffs did them any justice. But, I highly recommend them to anyone, young or old. These cream puffs have been masterfully created and it's unfortunate that they are not as popular in NY as they are in other parts of the U.S.

For those curious as to where they might be able to purchase these cream puffs you can look it up here. Until then, I'll be munching on these for a while. If you can think of any other baked delicacies that might top Beard Papa's- first try Beard Papa's out and be the judge yourself. If you are sure what you have is a winner (your thing over Beard Papa's), comment about it and I'll be the first on line to try out your challenge.

For now, Beard Papa's stays on my number one list of all good food. Nom, nom, nom.

Delicacies Talkin',

SJ

Possible and Rather Dreary Future of Writing

XX/XX/2008, at the Library....

Me: How do you spell "existentialism"?

Friend: Hmmmm..."E"...."X".... (waves and wiggles fingers in the air)

Me: Wait, stop, what are you doing?

Friend: (ignores me)..."I"...."S" (continues to do a sort of horizontal 'spirit fingers-' movement in the air)

Me: STOP THAT

Friend: What? Didn't you want to know how to spell the word?

Me: Yes but what are you doing?

Friend: (stares at her now frozen fingers in mid-air)

Me: Well?

Friend: (matter-of-factly) Typing

Me: I don't get it

Friend: You know how kids at spelling bees write out the letters of a word in the palm of their hands in order to remember how to spell it?

Me:...yes?

Friend: Well typing it out helps me remember the letters.

Me: (incredibly interested) ...how very interesting...

I'd like to call it phantom typing. It is an interesting practice used by tech-savvy kids who now wiggle their fingers in the air in order to recall letters and words. I attribute this phenomenon to laptops, computers, schools, and well, the Internet/Digital expansion.

Writing Today

Physical writing with pen and paper has now become a major hassle. It's too slow, it's too messy, and most of all, writing kinda hurts. This is true. After attempting to take notes in one of my professor's insanely fast PowerPoint presentations, my hand felt contorted, mangled, and bruised beyond healing. My hand was simply NOT used to writing anymore. Writing felt unnatural.

Fingers are meant to push buttons (such as typing on keyboards or pushing an elevator button).

Fingers are not meant to hold a pen and press out small intricate markings on white paper. Hence the unwanted middle finger callouses. Writing has now become an archaic and on-the-verge-of-becoming-obsolete practice. And I have to say, I welcome this change and progress towards a penless society.

Imagine, me actually writing this blog by hand. I can already see the results of this hypothetical but horrific attempt: an enormous whiteout stain on my forehead, bleeding pen marks, ripped out sheets of paper, and an unrecognizable disfigured right hand.

I've just repressed the urge to shiver.

Why Writing Might Linger Despite Impending Doom

1. People who do math (As I'm typing, a young man next to me is furiously doing his math homework- he has brought this particular group of 'writers' to my attention)

2. Short hand writing (Such as taking down a phone number etc.)

3. Artists, Traditionalists, and People who Like to Write (pshawww but seriously, some people love writing)

4. Notebook/Memo pad industries won't just roll over and give up (I can already see their "Writing is Cool" marketing campaign)

5. As well as other related industries that advocate writing:

Whiteout companies

Finger cushion companies

Chalk and Chalkboard companies

Cute pen/pencil holder companies

Whiteboard companies

A Simple Evolution Schema Depicting Writing Change

Writing -> Typewriters -> Computer Keyboards -> Touchscreen

Even in the mathematical world where writing is imperative in solving formulas -> electronic calculators have now eliminated the need to write out math problems

A Dramatic Speculation From Observing the "Phantom Typing" Phenomenon

Writing will become extinct once the tech savvy children grow up and teachers figure out how to edit student papers on Microsoft Word. Pens will become ancient relics to our "writing culture" past and the idea of calligraphy will become a myth. Rich people will pay thousands of dollars for handwritten documents because writing will dissolve from ritual to art.

In all this dramatic and incredibly far-sighted prediction: will READING (or words, letters, vocabulary) also become obsolete?

NO. Not necessarily, we still need codes, cues, signs, and print messages in our everyday lives: road signs, distinguishing name cards, and other representations of things in life. I believe books are still relevant in our future although other forms of media will play greater roles in educating society.

A Case For the Other Side

For those still in shock from all the outrageous things I've been saying so far, well, this has all been extreme "what-if" Dramatic Talk. But in all seriousness, I believe writing will undoubtedly evolve into something completely different. With the advent of touch screens and of Palm Pilots, there is a strong suggestion that handwriting may veer towards an incredibly detailed motion capture/electronic touch screen-esque path.

Although typing seems like the likely future in replacing handwriting, I believe that we as humans still crave to insert personality in our work. We won't be satisfied with point-12 font Times New Romans as a representation of our written creation. As there are different handwritings and signatures out there that add flair and close precision in directly representing our work, in terms of psychology, we want to write things down as ways to express ourselves.

Changing the font to Comic San might hint playfulness, however it does not fully capture the personal touch: flaws and all.

I do believe that writing is on a decline, with all the computer technology out there, hand writing has certainly become a chore for those who can type faster than write. I find it fascinating that there is a whole tradition and culture to writing now due to these events. Handwritten notes signify intimacy and concern:

- A company that sends you a handwritten note of apology is more likely to receive a positive response, no?

- Would you rather get a printed out phone number or a nervously scrawled number from your crush who seems desperate to ask you out?

As print books become electronically stored, all forms of media have now moved online, and the general craziness catalyzed by the digital movement- physically writing papers seems like an archaic practice. This might be coming from a college graduate bias standpoint (who has spent the last four years typing out research papers and typing notes) however nowadays children's toys emulate the iPad and laptop so much so that the future of writing comes into question.

Will writing exist thousands of years later? How will it change? Are we at the cusp of change?

Hmmmm... I wonder

Dramatic Talkin',

SJ