Disclaimer: All of the statements below are my opinions whether they should offend or not- that's really not my problem. Some people like apples, some like oranges. Likewise some people hate kiwis, some hate watermelons. What am I trying to say? I really don't know, but- let's respect one another's thoughts. With that said, the following list feature things that people generally love. I tried to avoid controversial objects such as tomatoes or religion, where there's a strong divisive opinion on the matter.
1. Gladiator shoes
Category: fashion
Primary Reason: ugliness
Level of Hatred: Slightly above average (hatred has been diminishing over time)
Hate Level Equivalent: a pile of unwashed dishes and sweating after taking a shower
I admit, I wasn't in love with them when I first laid my eyes on them. First impression word? Er- Primitive. However, as years went by and the gladiator fad still hasn't simmered down- I wondered...should...I myself, invest....in gladiators?
Being the shameless weak-willed follower that I am, I bought myself a pair of Steve Madden black gladiators, which I admit were very easy on the eyes. These sandals are less buckles and more of the stylishly braided cords-type. Gladiators have become something like a timid but ugly dog, which only becomes cuter and cuter as the day goes on (mostly because of its shy personality); until finally you forget why it was so ugly in the first place when it is so obviously adorable.
However, this happy feeling instantly evaporates whenever I see those impossibly crazy knee-high gladiators- faithful and true to the original ancient Roman footwear. And then my hatred level steadily rises against all gladiators sandals, uneven foot tans, mindless fashion trenders, and Russell Crowe.
2. Avatar (2009)
Category: movie
Primary Reason: the hype
Level of Hatred: a good amount of hate (sluggishly increasing)
Hate Level Equivalent: mosquitoes, wet socks, and diarrhea
Distracting the Hate: inspiring sci-fi movie from the same year: Moon (2009)
Where to begin? Just thinking about the movie catalyzes an explosion of haterade venom. The movie is equivalent to a bad chick flick or a mindless Hollywood action movie (or both). And if I just based my hatred on the movie's content; I'd rather be passive/nonchalant about it. It's not that I hate the movie so much as I hate the people who rave about it, which then causes a feeling of indirect hatred towards James Cameron and his success with his stupid Avatar. I don't understand the "achievement" and "grand adventure" of this movie. Avatar is colorful and pretty and might have something to say- but ground-breakingly imaginative? Let's be reasonable people. Avatar is a "B" movie. Calling it a masterpiece is ludicrous.
3. Licorice Candy (Twizzlers)
Category: candy
Primary Reason: taste
Level of Hatred: Immense (has remained so since childhood trauma)
Hatred Level Equivalent: Adolf Hitler, the iceberg that sank the Titanic, and cancer
Distracting the Hate: instead of licorice, perhaps Willy Wonka's laffy taffy rope?
When I was a child I had the misfortune of biting onto one of these things and promptly spitting it back out at the fool who had offered it to me. It had been a traumatically repulsive taste that invaded the mouth as well as the nostrils. Looking up "licorice," I've found out it's an actual herb used for medicinal purposes. This made perfect sense as the licorice candy tasted similar to cough medicine from what I remember. It's like making Pepto-bismol lollipops and Robitussin flavored chewing gum. I don't understand why someone thought to make a candy out of a medicinal herb, but to each his or her own, I guess.
4. Seals (Fully Grown and Hairless Variety)
Category: animals
Primary Reason: hurts the eyes
Level of Hatred: mild irritation
Hatred Level Equivalent: an empty fridge, sunburn, and runny nose
Distracting the Hate: cute fuzzy baby white seals are way too adorable to ignore.
I know I'm going to get a lot of hate for this but I never understood why people adore seals. They're kind of gross. The fuzzy white baby seals up in Antartica I can handle and understand why you might want to pick one up and squeeze it as long as possible. But usually, I cringe whenever "seals" come up in a conversation (which comes up more often than you think) because they look slimy and frightening. I don't know what to make of them. To me, they look like obese fish (tail and fin) but with mammalian features (nose, face, fat).
?!?! It's like a creature in mid-process of evolution.
5. Sex and the City
Category: TV show, movies
Primary Reason: not my cup of tea
Level of Hatred: fairly low but present
Hatred Level Equivalent: a long waiting line, a broken airconditioner, and misplaced key
Distracting the Hate: Desperate Housewives featuring the lives of fun, strong, and interesting women.
Fairly uninteresting show. Although I could understand its appeal to its target audience (city women with careers). But frankly I never loved it like my friends have. The drama of the show might catch my attention at times but overall the show is shallow, unfunny, uninspiring, and seems to think it's making some poignant thoughts on feminism, society, sex and urban life. Hmm, not really.
6. Zombies/The apocalypse-zombie infestation
Category: monsters
Primary Reason: sensitive gag reflexes
Level of Hatred: High
Hatred Level Equivalent: high beaming asshole drivers, unemployment, and hospital bills
Distracting the Hate: Frankenstein. He's semi-zombie but he's bumbly, naive, and ultimately a sad misunderstood monster.
I put these pictures up because they were fairly harmless and made me least want to gag. It's more from fear than hate, I'll admit.
7. Full Breakfast
Category: meal
Primary Reason: weak stomach
Level of Hatred: average
Hatred Level Equivalent: heartburn, hangover, and allergies
Distracting the Hate: replacing a heavy breakfast with a light coffee/milk and toast or just waiting for lunch.
My stomach cannot handle (as hinted with #7); especially in the mornings. Hence my natural repulsion from McDonalds. And bacon. Oh god.
8. Marshmallows
Category: candy
Primary Reason: Garcia effect/taste aversion
Level of Hatred: above average
Hatred Level Equivalent: cellphones ringing during movie, pimple before an event, and boring class
Distracting the Hate: smores, hot chocolate, marshmallows melted in pie or other baked products.
Here's the story: I grew up with a Nutritionist mother. This meant no sweets, candy, chips, soda, or anything dessert-ish in the house. The sweetest treat I was allowed as a kid would have been Honey Nut Cheerios and even that was hard to come by. In kindergarten, when a friend shared Fruit Rollups with me, I didn't even know to go about eating it. I remember eating the Fruit Rollup with the plastic wrap still on it.
It was tragic and I could go on and on.
Anyway, one day, a kid brought a bag of marshmallows to class one day and shared it with the whole class. It was amazing. The best thing I've ever tasted since the plastic covered Fruit Rollup. It was sugar that looked like fluffy clouds. I had to have more. MORE. And so I promptly stuffed my face with it until I felt ill and threw it all up. True story.
Ever since then, I have an extremely strong taste aversion to marshmallows (the taste, texture, etc.). Now, the only way I can digest a marshmallow is to melt it until it becomes liquid or some undistinguishable form (usually in hot choco or in smores).
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Since this post makes me seem like a real uncool hater, I'll come up with a post of "Things People Hate That I Love" to show I have heart. I thought this would be an interesting topic to divulge in but I'm realizing this kinda alienates me from society.
...But I'm sure one or two things in the list up there might resonate with some readers out there....amirite? amirite?
Diva Talkin',
SJ
